​ADHD and Relationships: How Does the Diagnosis Affect Partnerships? – Interview with Dr. Sabine Uez

1. What are the most common challenges for couples when one partner has ADHD?

Question: Dr. Uez, what problems arise in relationships when one partner has ADHD?
Dr. Uez: “One of the biggest challenges is often impulsivity and difficulty concentrating. Many of my patients report misunderstandings in communication. One partner may feel neglected or unheard, while the other struggles simply to focus their attention. This often leads to tension. Additionally, ADHD-related behaviors, such as forgetfulness or trouble with planning, can cause conflicts in everyday matters.”

2. How can couples improve communication?

Question: What strategies do you recommend for improving communication in such relationships?
Dr. Uez: “It’s crucial for both partners to develop mutual understanding. The non-ADHD partner should try not to take the other’s symptoms and behaviors personally. For the partner with ADHD, creating clear structures and routines can be very helpful. I often suggest brief, focused conversations and regular check-ins to ensure both sides feel heard and understood. Professional support, such as couples therapy or coaching, can also be beneficial.”

3. What role does medication play in improving relationships?

Question: To what extent can medication contribute to a better partnership?
Dr. Uez: “Medication can be very helpful in many cases for alleviating ADHD symptoms. It improves concentration and impulse control, which can positively affect the dynamics in a partnership. However, it’s important to combine medication with therapeutic measures to achieve long-term improvements in the relationship. Medication alone won’t resolve relationship issues, but it can help make daily life less stressful.”

4. How can couples strengthen their relationship when ADHD is a factor?

Question: What steps can couples take to strengthen their relationship despite ADHD?
Dr. Uez: “First, couples should take time to discuss how ADHD impacts their relationship. Open communication about expectations, needs, and challenges is essential. It can also help to find activities that bring joy to both partners and allow them to share positive experiences. Structure and organization in daily life are equally important. I often recommend using to-do lists or calendars to stay organized and minimize stress.”

5. How can the non-ADHD partner provide better support?

Question: What can the non-ADHD partner do to strengthen the relationship?
Dr. Uez: “It’s important for the non-ADHD partner to learn to be patient and understanding. ADHD symptoms are not intentional, and it takes time to adapt to the challenges. The partner can help by supporting daily routines and assisting with planning tasks when needed. At the same time, they should pay attention to their own needs and ensure the relationship remains balanced.”

CONCLUSION

ADHD can pose unique challenges for a partnership, but with understanding, communication, and clear structures, it’s possible to build a healthy and stable relationship. As Dr. Sabine Uez explains, it’s vital for both partners to recognize their roles and work together to develop strategies for managing symptoms. Professional support, including medication and therapy, can also play a valuable role in this process.